Sunday, June 3, 2012

The Godfather

My brother and I have had some rocky times.

We've always had our ups and downs like I'm sure most siblings do.  There have always been arguments and actual physical fights.  This is just a reality of being a brother.  At least it has been in our house.  Maybe some of you actually always get along with your siblings.  I don't see how it's possible.  When you have similar DNA, you have similar personalities.  And similar personalities oftentimes clash especially when you're as hard-headed as my brother and I both are.

We also have very different interests and world views.  The problem is we didn't really get a chance feel out our relationship as we both became adults.  My brother was in the Air Force and lived on the other side of the country for quite some time.  I also spent a two year period in Colorado away from my family that helped me grow, but sequestered me from many of my friends and family.  As we were both becoming the men we are today, we weren't around each other to interact and understand who each of us were becoming. 

Since we both moved back, we spent a little bit of time together even living in the same house for a while.  Even then we may as well have been two different planets in the same solar system.  His girlfriend at the time was also living there.  I didn't really have a soft spot in my heart for her, and I was more focused on my new job and the life I was about to start with Erin.

For awhile we were embroiled in an argument that just wouldn't go away.  There isn't a reason to get too in depth about it here.  Needless to say our hard-headedness and desire to always be right never helped.  For some time I feared that I would just have to live with the fact that my brother was family that I just didn't see or spend time with unless it was a holiday.  This killed me because I want to be in his life.  I want my children to grow up with his children.  Our girls were born a year before his daughter, and it seemed like we should be destined to watch these cousins grow up and experience all that life throws at them around the same time.  I worried that this wasn't going to happen.

So when he and his wife asked me to be their daughter's godfather for her upcoming baptism, I was overjoyed and honored.  I couldn't be more proud and couldn't wait to say "Yes."  And really the symbolism involved in baptism is perfect for our relationship and what it needed.  We needed to be washed clean of our past and start new.  We needed some divine intervention in our lives. 

I've seen the baptism of my own girls, and being part of the baptism team at our church has allowed me to see numerous other families go through it.  It's a moving experience every single time.  Now I get to see it as a godfather, and I couldn't be more excited.  I couldn't be more ready to carry the light of God for their daughter.

I've always loved my brother no matter how much we disagree on most every topic.  He may frustrate me and I know I frustrate him, but he was still the guy I looked up to all those years.  I'm glad that a fractured relationship is being pieced back together.  I know that both of our wives have pushed us to get our relationship back on track, and I thank them both for that.  Hopefully we can be an example to our children that brothers and sisters don't always agree, but they're always going to be there for each other.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

I LOVED reading this bro, and I couldn't be happier for you both. I love you !!